There are several different approaches you could take to writing a eulogy. What’s most important is to be respectful to both the departed and the mourners in attendance at the funeral. Here are a few points from our funeral service in nj has learned over our decades of experience:
Your Audience Understands This Isn’t Easy – The people you will be speaking to are in the same boat you are, they are in mourning. They understand how difficult it is for you to speak and they appreciate that you are taking the time and the effort to do so despite how you are feeling. So long as you are respectful, you will be appreciated.
It’s Better to be Too Short than Too Long – Short and sweet will go over a lot better than a long speech. That doesn’t mean say under 100 words, but it does mean that when in doubt whether or not to add something more to your eulogy it’s better to move the funeral along than to risk tiring your listeners during a trying time.
Don’t Be Afraid to say “No.” – If you feel truly unprepared to give a eulogy, don’t be afraid to decline. Mourning is hard, perhaps the hardest thing you will ever do. Some people are more suited to giving eulogies than others, it doesn’t mean that you don’t care. It might mean that you are overwhelmed by how much you care. Passing the torch to someone who feels better equipped to handle the eulogy isn’t a sign of cowardice, it’s a sign of respect that you want to give your loved one and those in mourning the best memorial possible.
Don’t Be Afraid to Ask for Help – Not everyone is a born writer. If you need help writing a eulogy or personalizing your memorial in any way, ask one of the experts at our funeral service in NJ.
Here are a few tried and true elements you can include in your eulogy...
Recount How You Met – Every relationship has a beginning that lead to so much more. When telling someone’s story, beginning at the beginning can be simple and effective.
Tell an Anecdote – Memories are stories and good memories make for good stories. For many people one individual story tells us a wealth about what they were like in life. For a charitable person, one act of charity can help us remember how charitable they were. For a funny person, telling a story of a particularly funny thing they did will remind mourners of the joy they brought them. Once you’ve told your anecdote you can provide a bigger picture of your loved one that will be appreciated by everyone in attendance.
Share What You’ve Learned from Them – We learn a lot from the people in our lives and people who have impacted us the most are often the best teachers. Sharing what they’ve taught you with their loved ones can be a powerful memorial.
Read a Poem – Was there a poem that particularly reminds you of the departed? Share it. Song lyrics? Read them. Make sure that they are respectful and evocative and a reading can do a lot.
To learn more about how to write a eulogy or plan other elements of your funeral service in nj, call Bergen Funeral Service Inc. at (800)262-7901.
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